Missing Persons Report
Burnaby Division CSI Unit

Date:  October 3, 2005.

Scruffster SkunkName of Missing Person: Scruffster Skunk.
Missing since: October 1, 2005.

-- Height: 3'2" (Standing on back paws)
-- Weight: 50 lbs.
-- Eyes: Blue
-- Hair: Black w/ white stripe
-- Distinguishing Marks:  Tattoo under tail which reads "SMELL THIS" in a freehand Graffiti font.
-- Species: Mustelidae Mephitis

Last known whereabouts: Lougheed Mall.  Automobile found at Trans Canada Trail Kiosk by Kask Bros.  Some damage to automobile.  Valuables scattered nearby along the Barnet Highway.  Robbery ruled out.  Abduction probable.

Timeline:  August 21, 2005

09:20 AM -- Scruffster Skunk seen leaving home in North Burnaby.
10:15 AM -- Lougheed Mall security camera catches frame images of Scruffster Skunk at an ATM.  Records show a withdrawal of $100.00

10:32 AM --  Female Greeter at Walmart insists that a skunk matching Scruffster's description lifted his tail at her.  Credit card records show that Mr. Skunk bought a music CD at the store: Phyllis Diller Sings Selections from South Pacific.
12:45 PM -- Neighbour spots Scruffster skunk in a panic, scampering around his yard screaming "I NEED A CHICO COMBO I NEED A CHICO COMBO."  After several minutes, Scruffster drives North and is not seen again.  The neighbour notices Scruffster drop a piece of paper.  She thinks nothing of it at the time but later pics it up and eventually hands it over to the police.

Abandoned automobile found 24 hours later.